" Gone Again " ...

It's lost again...
The love that she had for me...
All of that love is gone...
Gone...
I feel so unloved in this world...
The one person that I could count on...
And now I have lost it...
It's gone...
Alone in this world...
Feeling alone...
Lost...
Lost and alone...

" Back In Time " ...

I wish that I could just go back in time...
To two and a half years ago...
Heck...just days ago...
When I felt wanted...
Loved...
Appreciated...
Just...
Loved...
I miss it...
I miss being totally loved...
Yes...
I miss it...
Love...love...love...
Just that little bit of love...

" A Bad Person " ...

And now I question everything...
Okay yes I am synycal about myself...
But one thing I always believed was that doing good would bring good in your life...
And now I am doomed to bad things...
This is because the one thing I did...
Was good so good would happen to me...
But now...?
I'm just bad...
All around...
Even that one thing...
Doing good...
Is gone...
I'm destined for bad things...
Bad things only can happen to me...
Bad...

" I Hate Myself " ...

I hate myself for thinking things could be better...
I hate myself for thinking that I could be happy again...
I hate myself for thinking I was one person again...
Who the fuck am I...
I hate myself for feeling like this...
I hate myself for giving myself false hope...
I hate myself for thinking a monster like me could ever be loved...
I just hate myself...

" Too Good To Be True " ...

I knew the moment I started to feel safe again...
Loved again...
Wanted again...
It was too good to be true...
I was scared of it...
SO scared...
I wanted to pull back...
But I had just missed it so much...
That I was sucked in again...
Sucked into the dilemma that yes...
You can actually make someone happy...
But me?
All I come with is a main course if heartache with a side of pain ...
Yup that's me ...
Pain ...

" My Alter Ego " ...

When the whole world seems like a split second...
Yeah a split...
When they don't get you...
When you don't even get you...
Who are you...?
When you become someone else...
And that's the flaws everyone points out in you...
Not you...
Then who...?
But who...?
Who is that person...?
Who are you...?
Who...?
...

" Don't know Anymore " ...

It is as simple as it is...I just do not know anymore...