" Stranger " ...

She stood right in front of her bedroom mirror...
She sucked her tummy in...
With one hand she clenched her nose together...
With the other she hid her dark circles under those eyes...
She widened her eyes...
She stuck her chest out...
She thrusted her bottom backwards...
She held her thighs together...
Was she finally beautiful...?
She looked up and staring right back at her ...
Was someone who was a total stranger to her...
With shame, she turned her face and walked away...
"I'll never be like them..." ...

" Alone " ...

She ran the tips of her fingers softly across her belly...
That smile on her face...
The glow in her eyes...
Embracing her new responsibility...
The one thing that reminded her...
Of her recently lost love...
The one thing that kept the memory of her love alive...
Her new motherhood...
She had lost her love only but a few weeks ago...
Tragedy they said...
But this new human being inside her...
This was his sign...
That her love is always alive in her heart...
In her soul...
In her life...
She found out only but a few days ago...
And suddenly her loss didn't pain anymore...
Because she realised that her love never died...
True love never dies...
And this was a reminder of their beautiful love...

But...


Suddenly she felt something run down her thigh...
she looked down...
That crimson stain on the crevasses of her nightgown...
All hope was lost...
Suddenly all that pain came back...
And she had never felt more alone...
That glow in her eyes...
That smile on her face...
That hope for a new motherhood...
That hope that her love was never gone...
Lost...
Gone...
Forever...
Alone...

" Okay " ...

When you don't care about anything else...
When you don't care even if they hate you...
When you don't care if they don't like what you're doing...
When you don't care that they might see you differently...
When you just don't care...
Because all you care about is them being okay...
Them just being okay...
When that's ALL you wanna hear...
That everything is...
And will always be...
Okay...

" Broken " ...

All it takes is one line ,,, 

To completely destroy your heart ... 

All it takes are those words ... 

To tear your soul apart ... 

Just the thought that someone else makes you happier ... 

It is like a knife stab in the heart ... 

Just the thought of you being with someone else tears you to bits ... 

You suddenly feel like you're drowning ... 

Air ... 

Where's the air ... 

The tears filling up in your eyes just like water filling in your lungs ... 

The lump in your throat no matter how much you swallow ... 

You cannot even speak ... 

Why can't I even speak ... 

Broken ... 

Torn ... 

Gone ...
 

" Oxygen " ...

When the sands of time freeze, and you're stuck in a past that you tried to bury, you're the one person on my mind...
When life beats you down and says that you're not good enough, you're the one person on my mind...
When all your insecurities flood your brain and try to drown you, you're the one person on my mind...
When I'm stuck at a crossroad of very important life decisions, you're the one person on my mind...
When I need that little bit of inspiration and magic to motivate me, you're the one person on my mind...

You see...everyone needs that one person in their mind through all the bad times...
The one person to always remind them of the future and to let go of the past...
The one person who never sees you any less than your worth...
The one person that always reminds you what your imperfections is what makes you their perfection...
When you think of that one person...you just know that you've made the right decision and you're just not confused anymore...
The one person who inspires you to be the better you...to be the bigger person...to be the best you can be ...

And yes...Every second without you...is like seconds of my life gasping for breath...because it feels like I'm searching for my oxygen ...

" Really Important Notice Guys !! " ...

Okay keep this in mind. Never plan a "surprise" or anything huge for anybody birthday and stuff cuz from my experience tonight...It never happens...like you planned or in this case at all haha xD !! But hey I'm a sucker for surprises. Idk I just love them for some reason...!! :3

" Haunted " ...

Just when you start to move forward ...
Just when you realise that life is all about new beginnings ...
New beginnings to a past that you left behind ...
The past creeps up on you like a spreading disease...
And like a cancer spreads all those dark memories and those dark pasts you tried to bruy...
All the way to your brain...
Your heart...
Like a promise...
A promise that you'll never ever be able to bury it...
A promise that you will be living with it for the rest of your life...
Living with the feeling...
The exact same feeling you felt 12 years ago...
You're gonna live with it...
and just like a cancerous disease...
It never ceases to exist...
And you're haunted for the rest of your life...

Happy Birthday To The Most Amazing Person EVER.

GELUKKIGE 21STE VERJAARDAG !! 

To this extremely gorgeous retarded beautiful crazy stubborn mad insane amazing awesome loveable girl my bae forever and always (even though she just never admits it but shhhhh she is :3) you're 21 today eh !! Oldieeee (goal accomplished? I think so ~ hi-5 ~ hun) ;) but hey !! :3 the new year of 2015 has just begun...your new year has just begun today exactly !! 21's a milestone !! So congratulations. This year has been SUCH an up and down for me...and us we've had our differences our fights...but if it's something this new year had taught me and you have taught me is to always move forward...you have taught me to stay strong and always smile be curse it's killer haha :) you taught me to be my own person because that person in amazing...you taught me that it's our imperfections that make us perfect...and you seriously are my perfection ... you taught me to forgive but never forget...heck you have CHANGED NO LIFE and I am so thankful and grateful that you're a huge part of it...and I love you for all that and much more...have an AMAZING year ahead keep smiling and keep bring yourself because you deserve it and you're simply fabulous...don't let ANYBODY ever tell you otherwise (P.S. they're just jealous eh ;)) I love you... and HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY WITH MANY MORE TO COME GOD BLESS ... I LOVE YOU !! 🎉😍😶😘💕🙆✌🙈😆😌💜💞👈😉🙊🙉💥💫🎁👭👯💓💖💟💝💘💗💚💛💙💋👅👄

" Soul mate - For The Right Reasons " ... ?

She is his soul mate...
They were like love at first sight...
Her beautiful eyes, the way they glistened in the night every time she looked at him...made the stars look dull...
Her beautiful lips and they way they were as pink as a sun kissed tan...
Her long beautiful legs just perfect...
Her small little ears that she tucked her hair behind every time she'd laugh ...

She is my soul mate...
We are love at first sight...
The beautiful eyes of her soul and how they saw the world, so differently, changing my whole outlook on life...
The beautiful lips of her soul and how they taught me a new lesson everyday with her words of wisdom...
The way the legs of her soul just glided through life and took everything that it threw at her, inspirational and strong...
The ears of her soul and how they'd listen to everything that was hurting me and throwing me under the bus, and how talking to her comforted me ...

Yes we are love at first sight...and I am so in love with her beautiful, strong, perfect soul ...