" Summer " ...

A LOT of truth came out this morning...
Whenever there's a good situation...
I'm like this God...
Come a bad situation, and I'm ALL ONLY negative things...
All about the negativity...
And the reason that I'm low on self confidence very much...
Hate myself...
Is because the negativity about me in bad situations...
Is true...
I know it...
She knows it...
We all just do...
Good situations blinds her from this horrible beast that I call Nathania...
And EVERYTHING said this morning...
And all bad situations...
TRUE TRUE TRUE...
All of it true...
This summer just really scares me...
I'm scared...
What if she forgets again...
I know it will be my fault...
But nevertheless...
I'm just scared still...
I love her...
And I always will...
My heart can just never love another as I love her...
Never...
IF something goes wrong...
We go our separate ways...
I can never move on...
There's just too much over here...
The passion...
The love...
Heck even the fights...
I fucking am in love with her...
I fucking wanna be with her...
Have a big wedding...
Have a big family...
Be happy...
But the thing that I am scared of most...
Is breaking her heart by keeping her unhappy...
By fucking up again...
And again...
And again...
And...
Again...
Again...