" Trust " ...

So I just had a heart to heart with her...
Yes it does hurt like I bitch...
But I'd rather have her in my life as whatever she wants and is comfortable with...
Than to just lose her fully...
It was okay for her to delete my pictures and our whole relationship...not saying easy but in the end she did it...
But for me I just cannot erase what literally saved my entire life...existence...
And I just wanna kiss her...
Cuddle her...
Love her...
Her love me...
Show that she loves me...
Like before...
But yes...
It does hurt that it will NEVER be...
But she's still here right...?
But then ALREADY...
Talking about another crush...
I'm sorry but you broke my heart and then replaced me...
And say that you care...!?
That STABBED me...
HURT SO BAD...
Like why...?
Why always...?
I just cannot...
But I still fucking trust her with my life...
She saved it...
Yes...2 years 7 months and 17 days ago...
She SAVED ME...
But it just fucking hurts...
I'm just here crying...
I'm not even a BIT tired or sleepy...
Fucking day light outside...
I'm gonna get just a bit tipsy...
Need to get to class...
But I am also human...
And I just need to numb myself a bit...
God it fucking burns...
And the tears make my eyes burn...